Our most densely populated tier in 2022 is a collection of perfectly average, moderately enjoyable, entirely serviceable content. Like take for instance, Jim Gaffigan. He's fine. He's nobody's favorite comedian but when it comes to stand-up, you can certainly do a lot worse. So enjoy this plentiful bounty of Jim Gaffigan level entertainment. #67. Devotion It's really hard being the OTHER film about fighter pilots in the year of Top Gun: Maverick. And weirdly enough, "Hangman"

One tier above the Worst Films of the Year, we find our decidedly bad movies that still have their occasional moments of entertainment sprinkled throughout. Which is why this bad but not terrible tier is named after SNL C-lister, Chris Kattan. #89. Aftersun This may be a little too low on the list but honestly, I'm just so tired of this kind of slow-burn arthouse tragedy porn. It's such a bore watching silhouettes sob in the reflection of a big box television playing glitchy

On the whole, 2022 wasn't the best year for movies. From tent-pole franchises to indie horror pretenders and lackluster award hopefuls, the year was mostly full of underwhelming output. But while the majority of our 2022 recap resides in the middle tier, these were the bottom of the barrel embarrassments that will haunt you until the end of your days. And even though I'm as tired as you are of hearing about it, there was no more embarrassing moment in 2022 than Will Smith's i

Our very best of the year sit in this most highly regarded of tiers with the most precious of accolades the boring-ass gatekeeping elitist sport of golf can bestow upon you - these are the Gold Jackets. #11. Hygiene by Drug Church Typically the further a punk band strays from their hardcore roots and towards pop sensibilities, the worse their output becomes. But "Hygiene" is far and away Drug Church's most concentrated anthemic effort to date and also, the best album of their

Even though he had a pretty solid professional wrestling career, a couple of title runs and was technically inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame ( who isn't though? ); Kane was never really a headlining act. He had a pretty awesome look and had plenty of kick ass moments but thanks to the fact that he was introduced as The Undertaker's little brother - he never really escaped the shadow that cast upon him. And so these are the equally impressive - but not quite "BEST EVER" qual

The largest tier in this year's recap gathers the perfectly fine, not bad but not great, commonplace enough to be found in nearly every city in America - the Subways. They're decent enough, at least as far as fast food is concerned. And not entirely terrible for you either. But it's not spectacular either. Usually for every great flavor or fresh ingredient there's a stale one hiding to counterbalance it equating to a perfectly average experience. Welcome to Subway. #99. From

Anybody else miss the bygone era of trashy straight to video horror movies like Uncle Sam, Jack Frost or The Wishmaster? More often than not, just seeing the threatening VHS box art and imagining what the movie might be about was more gratifying than anything that was actually in the movie itself. But as bad as the movies often were, there was still some enjoyment to be found in watching something you probably shouldn't be. These are the bad but not terrible, entertaining eno

This year I tried not to punish myself with finishing albums I wasn't super into or force feeding myself material I had little interest in but wanted to have an opinion on it when the inevitable "whatabout"ers came spouting what they deemed to be worthwhile efforts that I had excluded from my list. But as a result, this is the smallest tier in the 4 years of doing this that I've ever had. Just three records make 2022's "worst of" list. These are the three calamities so appall

#9. Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation With the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre's co-writer, Kim Henkel, returning to direct this reboot (remake? sequel? I don't think it knows what it is...) you'd think there would be a little more thought put into the proceedings. But nope. It's obnoxiously loud and overacted, foolishly relegating Leatherface to serving as a cross-dressing henchman while Matthew McConaughey and Tonie Perensky take on the primary villain roles. An

#9. A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) I'm so eternally grateful that horror has been able to crawl out from under the daunting black cloud of Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes production company. They were absolutely hell bent on hollowing out every horror property imaginable into a soul-less imitation of it's former self in the 2000's and even though Jackie Earle Haley does his best to try and overcome the atrocious re-design of Freddy Krueger in this mind-numbingly dull remake, t

With creator Don Mancini taking back the creative soul of his murderous killer doll in the form of a hit SYFY series, aptly titled Chucky, we've decided to look back and rank every film in the Child's Play franchise. #8. Seed of Chucky After writing every entry in the series, Don Mancini finally steps in as the director for the fifth entry in the series and while it's kind of endearing to see Chucky's creator seemingly single handedly keep the series alive - this movie is a f

#13. Halloween Resurrection As weird as it is, this was actually the first Halloween movie I ever saw and honestly, I thought killing off Laurie Strode in the opening 15 minutes was pretty badass. It showed that absolutely no one was safe and that Michael was bigger than just his weird sibling rivalry. But looking back at it, the movie's an absolute train wreck in every other aspect and feels as dated as anything you could possibly drudge up from the early 2000's (including S

With Matt Reeve's The Batman introducing us to his take on some familiar faces in the Batman Universe, we thought we'd see where they stack up against the Best Batman Movie Villains of All Time: #20. Colin Farrell as The Penguin (The Batman) Colin Farrell's a phenomenal actor. But I couldn't help but think, "why not just cast a fat ugly guy in this role instead of caking a hunk in prosthetics?" This is America, surely there's no shortage of overweight ugly people out there, r

While he may not be a household name like many of his early VHS generation contemporaries, Paul Thomas Anderson is still one of the greatest filmmakers alive today. And even though he didn't get his long overdue Academy acknowledgement last night (fuckin CODA), we decided we'd still like to honor the phenomenal visionary the best way we know how - by assigned arbitrary rankings to incredible works of art in a sad attempt to spark conversation around actual films instead of th

The Top Tier in this Year's recap is dedicated to the best of the best, unimpeachable standard of quality set by fashion icon - Dan Flash. These are the industry gold medalists that all of entertainment should aspire to and can be priced at easily over $1000 because of how complex their tapestry of filmmaking artistry has been woven. First up is a sequel to the third remake of a 40 year old slasher movie... #9. Halloween Kills While David Gordon Green's 2018 re-quel garnered

Listen, I mean no disrespect to Kelly Rowland. She's an incredibly talented and beautiful young woman. She even made me giggle a few times in the critically adored Freddy v.s. Jason. But next to Beyonce, we ALL pale in comparison. This tier is dedicated to her and all the runners up out there not quite dynamic enough to flourish on the grandest stage. #33. Those Who Wish Me Dead Taylor Sheridan's latest throwback, neo-western thriller finds Angelina Jolie protecting a young b

The Middle Tier finds the inoffensive, middle of the road films that can best be described as average or slightly above. Fine. Like a Hershey Bar. There have been so many improvements on the candy bar at this point that a simple chocolate bar pales in comparison. It's still chocolate, it's just not anything to get all that excited about. It'll float around in the candy jar until all the better options are taken. #59. The Tragedy of Macbeth Maybe it's just the apple+ logo that

The Next Tier finds us with the bad but not entirely terrible films of 2021. If you're desperate enough, you can find some redeemable qualities in these titles - not unlike the music of Limp Bizkit. It's not perfect by any means but be honest, they've got a few songs that can get your head nodding here and there. #78. Coming 2 America After his long overdue return to the SNL stage, I was so ready for the Eddie Murphy revival. But Coming 2 America is a flaccid PG-13 follow up

Season 2 of COVID-19 had me watching a shit load of movies. More than I ever have in any one year. I'll say it, TOO many. And yet there were so many I didn't even bother with. Jungle Cruise, Red Notice, F9, other movies that don't star the Rock...but these were the worst movies I actually took the time to finish. Unlike Venom 2. I turned that shit off right away. Anyways, this is the bottom tier - the Big Ol' Motha Fucking Duffle Bags of Shit. #100. Malignant I'm not a huge J

Our top tier this year is the best of the best, cream of the crop, most precious of accolades - The Hollywood Handshakes. Sure, you may win a technical challenge or even be this week's star baker, but that shit gets handed out every episode. Hollywood Handshakes - those are reserved for the highest of achievements. Even if they do sound vaguely pornographic for those uninitiated with the Great British Baking Show... #10. The Cyclic Reckoning by Suffering Hour If there was a g